In Between the Lines

The thing is, all memory is fiction. You have to remember that.   

And, then, he went to his gun rack and took one of them down- it was a good day for hunting, he said.

As he sat there yelling at Mother Ogre to make him something else to eat, and barking at one girlee or another to get him this or get him that, our poor old dog,  Poser, walked by, and out of pure meanest, Ferrell Johnson,  kicked that unfortunate dog right in the side of his stomach. 

Poser howled and this girlee snapped.

The Ogre was sitting, cleaning his gun on the old grey davenport, and laughed at the pain of ole Poser.  And as he did, I walked into the kitchen – the domain of the Mother Ogre.  She was busy stirring up another batch of eggs to placate the Ogre. 

Quickly, I moved toward the knife center, where an assortment of knives lay in slits built for size.  I drew out the largest one I could lay my hands on- and moved towards the old grey davenport, knowing no one could see me.  Knowing that no one was looking anyway.

Something, finally, that was wholly and mysteriously wonderful.

Day 9--- What Have You Done with My Voice?

Day 9: Turn on your TV. Write down the first line that you hear and write a story based on it. As you know, I am in the process of finding my own writing voice,with the help of Brian Klems of Writers Digest and his 12 Writing Exercises.

I am getting to it, but have been so busy writing with my business voice lately,that my fairy tales, bonus exercise and now TV storyline are lagging behind. The weekend is coming - and I will be jumping on the train then to get caught up--stay with me!

Bonus Exercise - A Flash of Inspiration Before I Write About Fairy Tales

I was just surfing Facebook and my sister, Trudy, who loves art, placed this artistic rendition by Gustav Klimt on her wall. I think it would be an interesting writing exercise to write a short story ( 700 to 1000 words) with this artistic piece in mind. First, the title... Here is the piece:

And, I'll Huff and I'll Puff, and I'll Blow Your House Down!

Here is Brian's (Writers Digest 12 day Writing Exercise Plan. This is Day 8- wow it is getting weirder and weirder. Here is the assignment for today. Rewrite a fairy tale from the bad guy’s point of view.

Big BAD Wolf," This is going to be good"!

As I write these assignments and pass them around online, I often get comments.  Most of them are nice, but some are mean.  That doesn’t bother me- some people are just mean and they know they will never see me in person.

Because if they did see me in person, they might just end up with a broken toenail or two!  

One day, I sent one of the stories, (I think it was the one about Van Winchester) to one of the LinkedIn sites.  I don’t know what it is, but some of the people LinkedIn have definite snooty issues.  Anyway, this' woman' (I think- who knows who anyone is online?) asked me if I wanted a critique of the passage about ole Van.  I never answered her because if I had wanted a critique I probably would have asked for one, yes?

About two days later, this ‘woman’ wrote a short paragraph stating that  if I had wanted a critique she would have to point out that she had never seen ‘generous eyes’ in her life and just thought that expression was needless. 

Yeah, it was Van Winchester all right!  You know, the one with the ‘generous eyes’!?

What this woman (let’s call her Red just for the hell of it) didn’t know was who I was.
 

So, now I am going to let her know!

I am the Big Bad Wolf- and if I do ever run into her, I am going to huff and puff and blow her ludicrous house down!

Day 7- A Letter to Self

Well, this is my Day 7 assignment and I am grateful to Brian Klems Writers Digest for all of these exercises. You might wonder what happened to the assignment for Day 6. I did write it, but I felt it needed a lot more work, and besides it was very personal. There were two main characters in the story- The Ogre and the Mother Ogre. Both of these are characters from my past life and I will show them after all of these assignments are done. Here is the Day 7 assignment: Day 7: Write a letter to yourself telling you what you need to improve in the coming 6 months

Dear Self, In the next six months I would like to improve my exercise regimen. At the time of this writing, I have no exercise regimen, except for shoveling snow, which will someday melt away. It is difficult to get into an exercise regimen when there are no sidewalks to walk on. And, I also have no intention of taking a walk with Betty, my black lab- because I am certain she will make me fall down. I would also like to improve my eating habits. I have made a start with that by eating a low carb diet at present. I have not been to a fast food joint in over three weeks. Life has become a bore! If this letter is supposed to be about writing and how I can improve that- well, I really don’t understand how to do that. Web writing is for morons. The only concern of the editors is loading a certain number of keywords, and placing links to other sites in just the right place. I do not see that as creative writing, but as engineered marketing. If we are talking about publishing a fictional piece, anyone can do that now. There are all kinds of ways to self-publish. The only way to get published the old fashioned way is to either know someone in the business, or be a ghostwriter for James Patterson. Perhaps, I could improve my attitude, but that is beyond redemption and besides my attitude fits my personal beliefs. None of which are any of your damn business! Oh, I forgot- I am writing this to myself and I know my business. What a scream! Yours truly, April

Day 6--- Getting Closer to the Ogre

Here is the Day 6 exercise from Brian Klems 12 Day Plan of Writing Exercises This has been quite a stretch for me. After awhile, a business writer, especially one that writes primarily for the web begins to get a little dry. Web writing is informative and aimed at a specific audience. The business writer is supposed to engage the audience of the person they are creating content for, not 'find their own voice". Day 6 Exercise: Day 6: Select a book on your shelf and pick two chapters at random. Take the first line of one chapter and the last line of the other chapter and write a short story (no more than 1000 words) using those as bookends to your story. Here are the sentences I pulled from a book that was sitting on my dresser. The thing is, all memory is fiction. You have to remember that. ( this was the first sentence from one chapter) Something, finally, that was wholly and mysteriously wonderful. ( this was the last line of the other chapter) What came between the two? I might share it, and then again.....

Day 5 -Still Trying to Find My Own Voice!

Now,this next one was really not my style, but I understand the method behind the madness! I have never been a poet and I have always known it! HA! Maybe I am a poet. Anyway, the Day 5 exercise by Brian A. Klems Writer's Digest is as follows.

Day 5: Write a 20-line poem about a memorable moment in your life. Birth By April Brewster Smythe Being Young Is foolish By Definition Being Pregnant in the Seventies- Married And Twenty Years of Age Was predictable So I was expecting, a boy, a girl- we had no way of knowing then One crisp day in November, 1976' Sharp, slicing pains surrounded my body Agonies so far in the past That the troubles, stings, and twinges are not memorable now Midnight came quickly Doctors, nurses, and the large hospital framework called my name I cursed them all, the doctors, nurses, the hospital… My husband Became a target of grand abuse, Lying on a high-speed moving gurney Legs high in the air- and then Birth Never so alive, First sensing the presence of God!